i do!

I, like Sara, have not put a whole lot of thought into my (probably distant future) wedding. I do not know what color my bridesmaids' dresses will be nor do I have the faintest idea where the ceremony will take place. But that doesn't mean I don't have strong opinions about certain aspects of the modern wedding. Disclaimer: Training to be a divorce lawyer has put an interesting spin on my attitude towards all things bridal. So without further adieu here are a few of my raves and rants:

(1) First off, I would like to start off by saying that, despite what all the RomComs and magazines tell you, ladies it is NOT "your" day. In fact, really, your wedding day is the single day of your life that's least about you as an individual and most about you as part of an inseparable pair. It's the day you promise to become forever joined with another person. So ladies, please stop insisting on $10,000 dresses and $100,000 rings. Cool it, Bridezilla, IT'S NOT ABOUT YOU.

(2) With that said, my limited wish list includes this J.Crew dress or similar. I think it's unbelievably classic and just the right level of sophisticated. I love how simple it is, yet the cut makes it spectacular. I relish the idea of my new husband running his hands along the smooth silk as we dance and hug and kiss and do all that mushy love stuff. It looks like it would sway nicely too as I walked down the aisle. Plus it costs less than I currently make in a week at my sad little clerkship.


This chiffon and organza number is super cute too. I love how the model's hair is done in a low, messy 'do as well. I really think that style suits a wedding much better than a tight prom-like updo with lots of ringlets and pearls and glitter. I actually think most of the dresses that J.Crew offers are divine, and I recommend every woman look here first before casting her net into Vera Wang.



I will admit this Duchess Satin (left) is my ultimate wish, but let's be real - why on earth should anyone spend $1,500 on a dress you can't ever wear again? And just for kicks I have to throw this one in (right). Who on earth is going to wear a sloppy white t-shirt to their wedding??! (and pay almost $3 grand for it???) And I vote "no veil" (again, sorry Chels). Are you with me? Kinda played-out I think. I do like things old-fashioned, but that's going too far for me. Although I think I could be ok with something sorta 50's-styled like this girl.




Shoes are a whole 'nother issue, and I gotta say I favor flats for such an occasion. I cannot tell you how many brides I have seen barefootin' it around the reception because their poor tootsies are exhausted. My cousin recently got married and his wife spent all night in a beautiful pair of white ballet slippers. She never looked tired and she danced most of the time. Definitely something to keep in mind! If you still want to keep it fancy you could opt for something like this:

I also think J.Crew is on to something with their bridesmaids' dresses. A friend of mine was recently a Maid of Honor and filled me in on how easy it is to pick a color from the J.Crew palette and let all the girls pick the style that fits them best. My understanding is that all the J.Crew bridesmaids' dresses are available in all the catalog colors. So viola! This way the bridesmaids still look uniform, but (ideally) nobody ends up in an ugly dress they'll never wear again. Instead, they get a beautiful J.Crew cocktail dress they can wear just about anywhere.

(3) I'm also with Sara on the idea of a vintage, family heirloom ring. I too wear mostly vintage and antique jewelry, in part because I prefer the look and in part because I love the idea that this necklace/ring/bracelet has been loved before. You know that each piece has a whole prior life in which it was gifted to a fianceé or purchased with with that very first paycheck. These things have been treasured and worn in over the years. I especially love the idea of being given a family heirloom ring. The ultimate fantasy would be some 1920's diamond with an elaborate but tastefully subtle setting like this one.

And hey Sara: One of my best friends has a ruby engagement ring! Maybe you two can bring back the trend :-)

(4) And I, too, am tired of the strapless gown craze. Yes, this disdain may be influenced by the fact that strapless gowns look horrid on me. But I also don't think they look that great on anyone. The bride inevitably ends up pulling at her decolletage all night and you know those dresses always give you weird side boob chubs. I love, love, LOVED Ivanka Trump's whole getup. Again, the vintage look is so my style. I just think she looks timelessly beautiful in all that lace, with her arms and chest covered but still visible. Simply divine.